When Medical Conditions Influence Educational Decisions

"Why don't you homeschool Nathaniel?" The question was the first thing my mom asked when I answered the phone early Tuesday morning. It was asked last Saturday by a college friend, who has close to thirty years experience in public school special education, after she read my blog post about a Christian school's denial to consider enrolling my son. It is a question Rich and I have repeatedly asked ourselves, and it is a logical one given that homeschooling has been our educational choice for our other children.  Answering the question and making any educational decision on Nathaniel's behalf forces us to reflect on his journey.

When placed in our home through foster care, Nathaniel was enrolled in early intervention services offered through our state Department of Education. We have homeschooled for twenty-five years. Our experience with public education was limited to our older two sons who attended while living at their mother's home. Despite the unfamiliarity, we continued the services. The intervention model identified the child’s greatest need and offered one therapist to address concerns. Nathaniel was assigned an occupational therapist. We loved her. However, together we quickly realized that Nathaniel had more needs than she could meet in an hour a week.  Speech and physical therapy were added. Nathaniel’s experience with early intervention speech therapy has been documented here. Not soon after we began sessions, we stopped them. We sought private speech therapy to tackle what we knew would be long-term communication needs.

She Said My Son's Disabilities Will Create Classroom Managment Issues

I shared on my personal Facebook wall that we received our first rejection notice from a private Christian school for Nathaniel’s enrollment next fall. Someone commented, “I get how the school could make that determination. If they don't have a special education program with self-contained classrooms, then Nathaniel would have to be placed in a regular classroom. His medical needs and communication would most likely create classroom management issues.” The school’s reason "Our methodologies do not allow for a child to have a disability in the area of communication,” was the first hard blow of the day. The comment was a second and harder blow.

My All Done Broken Heart

I knew as I walked out of the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit in November that Nathaniel would recover from the acute illness requiring swift intervention. His body was already responding to the IV fluids. However, I also knew that my heart will never recover. There is no ointment or medicine or surgery that can fix how it breaks when I have to pin Nathaniel’s little body to an emergency room gurney and hear him plead with his voiceless screams and beg with his searching eyes for the procedures to stop.

Four Highly Productive Homemaking Tools

The life transition from mom of a few little children, to mom of a large homeschool family of teenagers, to mom of a child with complex medical needs has necessitated an ever changing approach to home management. I have far less time, energy, and help with tasks around the house now than I did ten years ago when chore charts for many children covered our refrigerator. And yet I still have all the mess of a preschooler up to his elbows in paint! The year of frequent trips to Cincinnati for Nathaniel's medical care demanded simplify my approach to cooking, cleaning, and planning. Here are four tools I have found worth their cost and my energy to keep me organized and home life moving forward.

Top Five Blog Posts for 2016

December has been a whirlwind of fun for our family.  Rich spent hours in the garage making three maple saddle stands as a Christmas present for Andrew; Nathaniel and I spent those same hours in the kitchen making yummy food for everyone. We were able to see all our children over the Christmas holiday and made some great memories. I love this photo of Nathaniel's first experience ice skating! Unfortunately Nathaniel is currently in the hospital with a virus. Rich is with him this morning to give me time to rest. I have enjoyed the quiet moments to reflect on my writing and reread some of this year's blog posts. Here are the top five most frequently read 2016 blog posts:

Merry Christmas 2016

Our Christmas cards are in the mail. It is the first year in decades that I did not write, print, fold, and send along an annual Christmas letter. I have had an affection for Christmas letters since I was in Jr. High School. I think I wrote my parents' at least once. I would have bundled up against the Ohio cold and walked to my grandfather's real estate office where I typed the letter from my mother's handwritten notes. I likely used all of Mrs. Sawvey's, my grandfather's secretary, correction squares fixing my mistakes. I diligently read every letter our family received back then, keeping many of them long after Christmas. I still do. Annual Christmas letters have waned in popularity since I was in Jr. High. We get fewer and fewer every year as our culture moves online. Similarly, we are taking baby steps away from those square correction tape days. Last year I sent a paper version of our letter with our cards, but posted it online for those who know us only through following Nathaniel's journey here. I dropped the printed letter completely this year. But the goal is the same regardless of the delivery - to reconnect, to share our highlights and joys, to wish you a Merry Christmas.