Swimming Safely with a Family
There are some activities, like house cleaning day, when having a large family is a real blessing. And then there are other activities, like swim day, when having a large family not only makes the task harder, but can sometimes even be dangerous.
I took my son and niece swimming this week and was immediately reminded of swim days with littles in tow. Our family started getting pool passes when our youngest was born. We went to the pool often, at least three afternoons a week. Between those parenting experiences and being a lifeguard for six years, I have some strong feelings on mixing children and water.
A few tips on swimming safely with a large family:
1. Schedule lots of time. Being in a hurry only adds tension to a situation that can already be filled with excitement and stress for both parents and children. This applies to leaving the pool too. Pull the kids from the water well in advance of when you want to be walking out the gate. Tired, sun-soaked swimmers need extra time to do everything.
2. Arrive at the pool with sunscreen applied. The natural tendency for little ones is to head immediately to the water. Much safer to line everyone up in the kitchen and put the sunscreen on at home than tempt eager little swimmers at pool's edge.
3. Use approved life-jackets. If you have more than one in the "must watch constantly" stage, buckle them up. Put life-jackets on after you get out of the car, but before you walk through the pool gate. Even the most obedient children have their moments. Don't find yourself having to chose between two small children floundering underwater in different areas of the pool.
4. Do not use swim assistant devices or toys in place of life jackets. Water wings, kick boards, and noodles do not replace the security of a properly fitted and belted life jacket. I've done CPR on a child whose mother thought water wings would cut it. PLEASE don't make the same mistake.
5. Provide shade and safety for infants. A baby tent provides shelter from the sun and enclosed safety from water's edge. A friend recently shared that using a blow up children's swimming pool on the beach provided a controlled area for their baby to splash in few inches of water without fear of her crawling into deeper areas. The pool was also used dry with toys.
6. Follow pool or beach guidelines about leaving children unsupervised. If they are under the age on the sign, supervise them at all times.
7. Use swim day to practice being a team. If the age spread of your children means significant variation in swim abilities, take turns visiting different areas of the pool as a group. Little ones can sit on the side and watch older siblings go off the diving boards. A rest from the deep end to play in the children's area is good for more advanced swimmers. Bottom line, mom or dad can't be everywhere, so everyone has to give a little.
8. Take breaks. Drink water. If anyone gets a headache they come tell you about, pull everyone out and get home.The symptoms of heat exhaustion are headache, muscle cramps, weakness, sweating, and nausea. Remember it takes a long time to get a large crew out of the water, dried, to the car, buckled in car seats, and all the reverse once you arrive home. Don't take a chance that things will improve with time.
9. Get help. If you have a lot of littles, go swimming when dad can come. A good friend planned summer meals, naps, and later bedtimes so their family could swim in the evenings with dad. Consider hiring a young teen to go along on your pool outings. Offer to pay his/her admission fee and allow them to stay to hang out with friends after your family leaves. Or hire a sitter to stay home with the youngest so you can enjoy the outing with the older children.
10. Go often. Children thrive on routine and consistency. They learn by doing something over and over again. If pool day is hard and draining, it's a sign you need to go more frequently so the children learn what is expected. Practice makes perfect. Before long, swimming will be enjoyable for everyone!
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Want to take a stab at which of my blog posts is the most popular?
Most of my readers would probably guess it to be a post about Nathaniel. His airway emergency in May had over a thousand views within ten hours. Posts about his hospital stay later that same month were equally visited. The post introducing him on adoption day had seven hundred views the first week.
But the most frequented page on my blog is not about Nathaniel. It is... drum roll....
I have enjoyed watching Nathaniel adapt to having his right hand in a cast. He is very creative. Like in the way he decided to look at a book today. He carried his Daniel Tiger book around all day and refused to go outside unless I let him take it along. I am not sure about that cast pillow, but he seemed comfortable and happy in moment. Pretty happy playing with big brother in "bean dirt" earlier this week too.
There were three places I wanted to be on Saturday night: my sister-in-law's surprise fortieth birthday party in Wisconsin, our church's annual fundraiser to support outreach to the marginalized in St. Louis City, and an Eagle Scout ceremony for a young man Rich has encouraged for years.
Instead I spent Saturday evening standing outside a chicken coop with Nathaniel.
I write so much about Nathaniel's communication needs, that I have not put into writing the other areas of development that we are addressing in therapy. There are many. Nathaniel continues to have a global developmental delay and some significant sensory processing needs. He has consistently received Occupational Therapy and Physical Therapy in addition to his twice weekly Speech Therapy. We had a long day of appointments at St. Louis Children's earlier this month and the collective decision was to start some new weekly therapy there to address some of the sensory needs. We go tomorrow for our first visit, which increases OT to twice a week now. We are putting PT on hold for a time to allow for the extra focus on OT.
This weekend marks five years that Rich's father has lived with us. We considered waiting to adopt until our season of assisting Grandpa was over. Caring for an aging parent in your home is a unique challenge that only those in the trenches can fully understand. Accepting additional responsibility through adoption seemed... let's be honest... risky? Or extreme? Or radical? At the very least - hard. One of my struggles while taking the foster and adoption classes was the long mental list of the sacrifices I've already made for the sake of elderly care. "Surely God, you don't expect me to take in a child when I'm already giving so much?"
A mom steps timidly forward.
A protective older brother watches cautiously.
A baby looks for reassurance.
A mom stands courageously to the side.
And the photographer positions the moment I met my son in a larger story:
his foster family loved him well.
We met Nathaniel on July 3, 2013.
Nathaniel Steven Rankin
It seems we've always had to cope with our children being away from home on Christmas.
Rich spotted it first. An empty bird's nest nestled in the branches. We paused. Admired. Took a photo. Considered the tree. But moved on, leaving the nest for whoever claimed the tree.
I went to court for the first time in my life yesterday. And it about did me in.
We were lying side by side on the floor in the empty bedroom when Rich whispered, “I want to submit our home study for the baby.”
She couldn't concentrate on the work and smile for the camera at the same time. Sunday night pretzels. An Uncle Rich tradition for 20 years and tonight Ellie was assigned the responsibility of helping to make dinner for everyone attending the family reunion.
In route to Arkansas last weekend to visit our daughter and her husband, one particular turn along highway 67 south caught my attention. I saw the first sign at least a half mile from the curve: large yellow rectangles on both sides of the road warning a sharp left bend. CAUTION. Blinking lights. Danger Ahead.
At our house the "Oh-my-goodness-it's-summer" turns into boredom in about 48 hours. Without a schedule and some resemblance of a routine, my children quickly resort to game systems to fill their days.
We are starting our fifth year caring for my husband’s father in our home. It has been a very rewarding experience that has enriched our lives tremendously. The last four years haven’t been conflict free though, and I’ve learned a lot through the process of sharing my home with an in-law. Perhaps these three lessons will encourage other families in a similar living arrangement.
The Facebook message from my friend, Beth, caught me off guard.
I had thirty minutes to waste at Barnes and Noble last weekend and walked out with John Eldredge's Fathered by God: Learning What Your Dad Could Never Teach You. I didn't intend to by a book on manhood, or even intend to buy a book at all. But when I thumbed through Elderidge's book, a chapter title caught my attention: Cowboy.
I have a box of Christmas things marked "OPEN BEFORE THANKSGIVING." It contains the items we need to celebrate Advent: our wreath and candles, booklets of Advent readings from previous years, our Christmas music CD's, homemade nativity scenes, and three of our favorite family read-alouds for the Advent season
We had the opportunity this fall to visit the Menominee Indian Reservation in Wisconsin with a group of volunteers. We spent a Saturday cutting firewood for the tribe's senior citizens. As our group processed what it meant to be invited onto the reservation, we were challenged to think of ourselves as bridge builders from one culture group to another, and then further challenged to think of tangible things we could do to build bridges.
I had a few extra minutes before making Grandpa's breakfast this morning, and picked up Vicki Spandel's The 9 Rights of Every Writer. I wanted to review some of Spandel's insights on teaching. She is good. She got me by the end of chapter one - student writers have the right to be reflective.
f you're like this homeschool mom, you're wondering just how summer slipped by so quickly. I really need to crack down the next couple weeks and to get ready for the new year.
First thing to do every school year is compile a list of subjects and texts for each student. I have used the Course of Study form on Donna Young's website for years. (Thanks Donna for the amazing resources you offer free!) Compiling this document gives me a chance to do a last minute check on everyone's books and supplies, and also makes a great first page for the Missouri required portfolio of student work.
Recently one of our older children text late at night and asked if I had time to answer five very specific questions. I did. He called, and I answered the questions quickly. And then I asked, “Are you doing some kind of writing?” Having been his home school teacher, I recognized research mode. He shared that he was writing about what the resurrection of Jesus Christ means to him. The questions were focused on Nathaniel, and I curiously asked if he would share his work with me. And then I asked permission to share it with the world.